HELP! stuck with a horrible man!!!!?

Question

So i've been a year with my boyfriend.... I'm divorced....family is pressuring me to tell him to at least propose so we all know I have a formalized relationship
he went on a business trip 2 weeks ago and the 2 whole weeks he was away he was very mean to me. he did and said things my ex used to do to hurt me (it's not like he doesn't know about it...he knows it and he knows those things hurt the crap out of me)......to put things worse those two weeks I was hearing rumors from my co workers that i was gonna get fired (because the company is doing bad and they have to fire people) ...he knew about this too and knew i was very sensible and emotional and not feeling well...so his attitude made it harder for me to cope with everything going on...... i tried to tell him over and over again he was hurting me...he refused to listen and even made fun that i was crying..... my last resource was to call his parents because i was really desperate and hurt (I hate when parents intervene.. but i didn't know what else to do)..... then he got so mad and was breaking up with me for calling his parents when I have been the one he's been hurting for the past two weeks!....then he arrived from his trip and i went to his house because his mother invited me over.... and he was like: i told you i did not want to see you..why are you here?...you think this is a joke? you think I'm joking? I'm being serious about this............ to make long story short we didn't break up but he was mean and cold the entire night... he even said nasty things like: i bet they are firing you because they cant stand you like I do.... you are stupid, everybody thinks your stupid.. my parents, my friends...everybody ok?,,,,, and I'm not proposing to you any time soon because I'm not sure i wanna get married...single life is better...and plus i don't have the money ok?"... (BS, his parents are multimillionaires...but he doesn't work, he lives out of them...so i think he is waiting for them to die,, whatever i don't know what he is waiting for to grow up some balls!...i work my butt off!!!!)
he also threatened to hit me.... and its not the first time he threatens to do it....
...........and i asked him "why are you being so mean?".... and he was like: "ha ha because you're a slut...you're my slut right?"....and i was like: no, I'm your girlfriend....and he was like: yeah, but also my slut,, right?...URGH........ so i told him i wasn't gonna have sex with him anymore, no matter how hard he begs and cries for it!
then I called my dad crying and i told him that he was being mean to me and saying things my ex used to say and my dad said Im not allowed to break up with him because Im divorced and finding another significant other will be hard, at least in the country we live in.........
so now Im stuck with a guy who is not sure he wants to marry me and is crazy!..we once had a fight on the phone because he said he wanted to punch me in the face and i told him to be a man and punch another man, not a woman...to stop being a coward in threatening to hit a girl........ then i went to a party at his house and i was going to the bathroom and he followed me and he grabbed my neck from behind and i was like: it hurts...why are you grabbing me that way?....and he was like: i have never beaten you up..so stop saying i did!..... and i was like: i did not say you hit me...i said you are coward for threatening to do it! ..ouch!!! stop doing that!!! " ..... then he let go of me and and said: that is to show you who's boss here
he even said that if we get divorced he is not paying pension or anything.... as if, unlike his ex girlfriends I'm not interested in his money....... and you might ask why my dad is telling me what to do?.... i am from a very small community where elders run everything and everybody... so...
his parents are idiots.. they even laugh about things that aren't funny at all!...everything is funny to them..its creeping me out!...if I have to be with this guy.... please give me good comebacks when he says hurtful things so he stops saying them!
some of them are: I want you but i also want a latin girl...can you be both???...can you change you eyes color so you are you but still look like another girl?
you are my slut
i'm going to punch you one of these days
i cant stand you..you are so mellow...(he said this very coldly and with a very aggressive tone of voice)
i wont propose to you because you are stupid (I cant call him stupid back because it backfires and he goes crazy and yells me i have to respect him... cant say "you respect me first" because he gets REALLY crazy

...........how can i answer him back and making him feel like a total jackass without making him backfire at me?
please help, i don't know what to do.... im praying to God to make him cheat on me, so everybody finds out and let me break

Answer 1

wow sweetie, by the sight of this post i am not sure where you are from or what you are involved in, but this story you tell is common amongst my sisters, relatives, and friends that are scheduled to just meet eachother and get married and even if he is a jerk you cant get out of it unless he does something royally messed. so everone has their own circumstances and maybe you should be more open mined to him and do what he tells you to do maybe by you responding to his jerkly ways with a saoft voice or if he is angry do not speak, possibly by doing these things this might in return sprout the goodside of your bf and make him a better man because as you inprove you he has no choice but to stay on top of his job just like you and that is where your reward comes in.

Answer 2

You're not stuck with anyone, more like you just won't move on. After reading all of that, it's obvious you have some issues. It also seems like you play the victim and typically those that play that role are actually the instigators. Something tells me your bring the worst out of people with suttle mind games and gives onlookers the impression it's the other persons fault. I've met a few like you and I always exit stage right.

Answer 3

most of the time you should listen to your parents

this is not one of those times

you should not be with a man like this, it is terrible, and things will only get worse in marriage

there are a lot of people out there, i know a lot of guys that would never do things like this to you

it might take some time, but it will be better in the end

please please please get away from this horrible man

you seem like a smart, hard working woman, there are men out there that appreciate that, i promise

i know i do, and i would NEVER treat my girlfriend like this, there is NO EXCUSE

tell him it is over and try to find someone who will treat you right



and i don't want to sound bad, but if you were my daughter, i would take a bat to that guys face

Answer 4

Oh my goodness girl!! You need to get out of this relationship and away from this man as fast as you can. Nobody deserves to be treated that way and it will only escalate and worsen. Your best comeback to him is to leave and never look back. It is better to be single and safe and happy than to be stuck in what sounds to me to be a miserable relationship. He is trying to control by taking down your self-esteem, you musn't let him do this to you. I've experienced something similar to this before and believe me one day he will make good on those threats to hit you. Honey you do NOT deserve this, please try to leave before something even worse happens. Good luck to you. Be safe.

Answer 5

Either this is total bullsh*t or you're in it for his parents' money too. because no one sane would put up with being treated like that. That's your damned problem...you've turned yourself into a walking doormat for losers. And if you continue to stay in this relationship, then you're a loser, too.

Answer 6

so i whistled for a cab and when it came near, the license plate said fresh and there were dice in the mirror. if anything i could say this cab was rare, so i whistled to the cabby, yo homes! to bel aire!

Answer 7

Whoa, I feel sorry for you. My advice is to tell people this! Hell, show them this question that will most likely work! And leave that douchebag manwhore.

Answer 8

Uh....so you might end up marrying a man that's scum on earth BECAUSE OF WHAT PEOPLE MIGHT THINK???????



I'd be outta there so fast the guy wouldn't even see me leave. I don't care what he would think, what my parents would think or what his parents would think.

Answer 9

U r Not stuck with him. He has no respect and your life will be hell if u marry him . Leave him Nowwww.

Answer 10

DAMN. LILY, call me , way to much drama , you think ?

unless , you want to be on the talk show crap ?

Answer 11

leave him and find someone better

Answer 12

get rid of him